A Mother and The Adventures of Gabriel

This post is adapted from my interview with Brian Gerrish at UK Column.

Gabriel was forcibly removed from my care the week before he turned ten. Armed police came to where we were staying. No conversation beforehand. They took him. About a month later, I was given one hour weekly on FaceTime. I was mocked in court: how on earth would I talk to a ten-year-old for an hour? I remember thinking: I know exactly how to speak to my son for an hour.

The first few months are a blur. But I recognised quite soon what I was facing, and in that moment of recognition I thought: right, you have got to step up. Your child is depending on you. Exercise every morning, however little. One goal a day. Keep winning the day. Gabriel had always loved stories. So that is where we began. Michael Morpurgo's Puffin Keeper, reading back and forth, pen and paper games, an illustrated Treasure Island where the hero shared his granddad's name. At the end of that book I asked: "Should we make up a story where you are the hero?" Instantly: yes.

I did what I had done for twenty years as a physiotherapist: I extracted his story. Tell me more. Is this what you meant? He narrated. I scribed. My father created images using AI art. Gabriel chose the pictures. Eight weeks later, six short stories. I put them in one Word document. Gabriel looked at the screen: "Mum, it's a book." Not two printed copies. A real book. We sent it to people who knew about children's literature. Both said the same thing: get this out now, there is nothing where children are writing for children.

I did not realise until about the fifth person asked detailed questions about my process that I was applying physiotherapy skills. Creating safety. Extracting story. The verbal handshake: reading back what I had understood, asking what I had got right and what I had missed. That is exactly what I was doing with Gabriel. And now with 465 children across nine schools. I have asked every single one: "Would you like to be the hero of your own story?" Every single one has said yes. At no point is anyone facing a blank sheet of paper.

This week something extraordinary happened. Gabriel and I bumped into each other by chance in Cheltenham. A mutual friend had posted about a stationary shop. I went to buy a gift. He was there. I hugged him and hugged him and hugged him. In some ways it felt like two years had not happened. In other ways the relief was enormous. Through all our Zoom calls I had sensed he had never lost his confidence in me. We had talked about it: "We just have to trust one another, darling." But to feel that trust again, to feel his certainty in me through that hug. The best thing about it: a coincidence. No preparation, no build-up. I went to a shop and he was there. Absolutely meant to be.

While all of this has built, Yorkshire Post, BBC Gloucestershire, BBC West, MSN, Yahoo, then two Canadian education magazines, then Pakistan and India features in progress, I am still living less than a mile from Gabriel in Cheltenham, sitting on FaceTime. But what Gabriel and I have created is bigger than us now. One boy in Gloucester wanted to solve the Middle East conflict in his story. His friend: "Seriously, how on Earth are you going to do that?" "Well, first we're going to sit down and have a cup of tea." At the end there is a big party and a pizza party. They debated as a class whether you should have pineapple. These are the important decisions. The entertainment is within the child. You do not need to compete with their iPad. You just have to ask the right question.

When Brian asked what message I would give Gabriel, I could only speak from my heart. "You are braver and more courageous than most grown men. I did not give you your name because it means messenger of God, but boy. I pray the power of your voice has impact we cannot yet imagine."

Listen to the full episode to hear the complete story:

https://www.ukcolumn.org/video/a-mother-and-the-adventures-of-gabriel